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One Million Lawyers

Words and Music by Tom Paxton

Humankind has survived some disasters, for sure,
Like locusts and flash floods and flu.
There's never a moment when we've been secure,
From the ills that the flesh is heir to.
If it isn't a war, it's some gruesome disease.
If it isn't disease, then it's war.
But there's worse still to come, and I'm asking you, please,
How the world's gonna take any more.

[Cho:]
In ten years we're gonna have one million lawyers.
One million lawyers, one million lawyers.
In ten years we're gonna have one million lawyers.
How much can a poor nation stand?

The world shook with dread of Attila the Hun
As he conquered with fire and steel.
And Genghis and Kubla and all of the Khans
Ground a groaning world under the heel.
Disaster, disaster - so what else is new?
We've suffered the worst, and then some.
So I'm sorry to tell you, my suffering friends,
Of the terrible scourge still to come.

[Cho:]

Oh, a suffering world cries for mercy.
As far as the eye can see,
Lawyers around every bend in the road.
Lawyers in every tree.
Lawyers in restaurants.
Lawyers in clubs.
Lawyers behind every door.
Behind windows and potted plants,
Shade trees and shrubs.
Lawyers on pogo sticks.
Lawyers in politics.
In ten years we're gonna have one million lawyers.
How much can a poor nation stand.

In spring it's tornados and rampaging floods;
In summer it's heat stroke and drought.
There's Ivy League football to ruin the fall,
It's a terrible scourge without doubt.
There are blizzards to batter the shivering plain.
There are dust storms that strike, but far worse
Is the threat of disaster to shrivel the brain;
It's the threat of implacable curse.

[Cho:]


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